You Hurt Me .. You Complete Me

You Hurt Me, You Complete Me...

This work was inspired by a couple, Or used to be.To Q.A & S.M.  S.M. Telling the story :  We met in a semi blind date back in Jan 2008; it was the top floor of a 5 stars hotel with a gorgeous view of the city. He was waiting in the corner table were I was hesitating to enter the restaurant door. I took a peek from the entrance door were I saw him setting near the window looking confident and so handsome. That’s when our eyes converged and in a second everything else disappeared. Its like nothing else mattered.  4 hours passed like seconds. We didn’t want the day to end but here comes the waiter ” I’m sorry but we are closing in 10 minutes. Its almost midnight”. Neither one of us want it to end, But it has to like everything else in our life… Since then we both felt the Need to be around each other at all times. It was a need not a desire, we both have everything “literally” but we didn’t felt complete but with each other.  What was more excited was our secret love. The taboo made it more desirable. Few months passed like a dream were everything was beyond perfect. I remember once we were coming back so late Passed midnight from a trip in the farms south of Kuwait. The road was lightless and so dark. Here’s when I told him; look at all that Magic dust in the sky, Its so beautiful. Can we pull over for a second to watch it ? Sure dear, why wont we A.A. said! . We cuddled by the car for few minutes watching the starts sparkling in the sky at middle of nowhere in complete darkness. It was so quit and black. It was one of my favorite memories in my life. I wont forget it as long as I lived…Before few days of my birthday one of his best friends got very sick and he was sent abroad for treatment. My A.A was his escort in that trip. They went to Europe and we didn’t know when they will comeback. The good bye was bitter, Since we met that was the first time to be separated. I’m not used to it. I will never be… The first few days were normal. Daily phone calls and regular texts. But after a while something changed. I don’t know what happened but he became different. Or pretending to be different I’m not sure!
Almost 2 months passed till he came back; It was not the same. Something was different about him but I couldn’t see any reason why! Unfortunately i had to travel in 2 weeks in a medical trip as well. We didn’t have the chance to meet a lot at that time and the day has come, my flight was at 4am.  He came to say good-bye.  To me and how convenient was that!His birthday was the week after. i wanted to deliver his gift at the time of his birthday but something made me do it at the moment. He unwrapped the box and saw his gift. That’s when he gave me the look that says “No one will love me like you do”. Then he gave me the strongest hug I’ve ever had. Its like that he will never see me again! I went to Europe, Somewhere in the countryside. I checked in in that very old Hotel. I think it was built back in 1940s at the Communist Period. The room was so small and the place was full of negative energy. I was choking in that place. I couldn’t breath in it. I was alone. I needed him. I needed him so bad to breath, to feel alive. I called him and once he knew that i arrived and I’m ok everything changed 180′ degree’s. He started to ignore my calls with the excuse of “I was busy”.I was supposed to stay longer (a month or so) but i couldn’t, the people, the place and his absence, were all Unbearable. I was so young that time I couldn’t handle it. I booked my flight back in 4 days. All I wanted is to be between his arms. I came back with a bag full of gifts. I spent those 4 days shipping for him instead of caring about the medical stuff. How naive was it!The flight was 7 hours it felt like 7 days, I couldn’t wait till the plane arrived to Kuwait atmosphere to call him but there was no answer, Just like that. With No explanation!And that was it. After a year or so the gifts were still unwrapped…The coincidence leaded us to meet in an unusual place with unusual company. I think he felt that i moved on. That’s when he texted me … And the history repeated him self one more time!For 3 years we were ON and OFF in a weird way. Its like we cant live without knowing that we exist in each others lives even if we weren’t in a relationship, It was enough that we were there, it was enough to know that each one of us is happy in his life. But how could that be! We were both pretending to make each other believe that we moved on…We tried to make it work but it didn’t, I guess we both knew that our relationship wont last, our love was true but not logic.It has been years and I still fall for him. I think of him every day. I met people after him but no one made me feel the way he did. He gave me such a high standard that is so hard to measure with, In exchange he took an irreplaceable piece of me that I know it wont be safe with him… I’m 5 years older now. Everything around me has changed. My interests, My friends, My life. Even me .. i’m a different person now the only constant was him , My feelings never changed. But I like to think that i look at him differently now, It helps me to move on and not to feel the bleed. I still believe that he owns a piece of me. I will never be completed without it… I miss him in an every way a person can be missed…